Of Wizards, Ninjas, and DeathNotes
by EroSenin'sDeciplesKJT
Summary: A challenge fic for EroSenin'sDeciplesKJT. Task summary inside. But basically a parody of DeathNote using characters from Harry Potter and Naruto. It doesn't necessarily make sense but I had fun doing it. Could possibly end up as drabbles in the future.


**ChAlLeNgE FiC**

This is the second challenge that was issued by one of EroSenin'sDeciplesKJT. This month's challenge was issued by 'T' and here are the rules:

_1) Must use all three characters in the story from each show. The Disney character or the Spongebob character can have a small part or not talk at all but MUST be mentioned in the story.  
_

_2) Must use the song quote and the 'other' quote at some point in the story word for word._

_3) If you wrote an 'M' fic the first time, you must write a 'T' rated or 'K' rated fic._

_4) Must be done by Oct. 31 Midnight!_

Here's what I had to work with:

T's Task:

Song Quote: "Toucha toucha...I wanna be dirty..."

Other Quote: "To be or not to be..."

Characters: Percy Weasley, Anko, and Squidward.

So there's what I had to work with. Not much but I did what I could do. Anyway, things you need to know before reading.

**DeathNote:** DeathNote is an anime by Tsugumi Ohba. The basic plot is of a boy who finds a notebook called 'DeathNote'. The notebook has a set of rules regarding the use of it. Here are the 7 main rules of the notebook in case you've never seen the show. (And I HIGHLY recommend the show. It's excellent. Best show you'll ever watch.)

The Rules

1. The human whose name is written in the note shall die.

2. The note will not take effect unless the writer has the person's face in their mind when writing his/her name. Therefore, people sharing the same name will not be affected.

3. If the cause of death is written within 40 seconds of writing the person's name, it will happen.

4. If the cause of death is not specified, the person will simply die of a heart attack.

5. After writing the cause of death, details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds.

6. The note shall become the property of the human world, once it touches the ground of (arrives in) the human world.

7. The owner of the note can recognize the image and voice of its original owner, i.e. a god of death.

Well, I guess that's all. Enjoy. Oh and btw, don't expect the plot to make sense. It's not really supposed to.

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

**x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

_To be or not to be… _Percy let out a sigh before plopping back down on his bed. It had been a long, tiring day of classes and all he really wanted to do was just lay down and take a nap. _Take a nap. Yeah right._ _This is a very important decision and I need to make it now!_ Percy groaned before falling back against the sheets. _Why did I pick up the notebook? I should have just left it alone but…but what if someone other than myself would have found it? Would they have used it for good? No…probably not so yes…Yes I shall make myself the…_There was a soft knock at his room door causing him to frown.

"What is it?" he asked. His family knew that he never wanted to be disturbed at this hour. From 7pm to 11pm was Percy Weasley study time and he hated being interrupted during his studies.

"It's me…Ron."

"What the heck do you want? I'm studying. Something you should try every now and then."

"Well I'm sorry to bother you but…mom says you have a visitor." Percy stared at his door frowning. _A visitor? But I haven't got any friends. Hmmm…_ Percy hurried and opened the door staring down at his dubious little brother.

"Visitor huh?"

"Yeah. I couldn't believe it either when mum told me but apparently she's waiting downstairs. Pretty girl. Much too pretty for you…" Percy slammed the door in Ron's face.

"Be down in a second," he yelled. Ron cursed loudly as he stormed down the stairs of the burrow.

"A visitor huh? This should be entertaining."

"Oh shut up Squidward! Why don't you act like a Shinigami for a change and shut the heck up! Go be invisible and annoy someone else."

"No can do Mr. Death God. You have the notebook and unless you give it back to me permanently then you're stuck with me. I tell you what. Give me an apple and I promise not to talk during your meeting."

"No. I do not take orders from dead things," Percy grumbled.

"Actually I am not dead. I am a living, breathing…uh…thing."

"Yeah whatever. Let's go." Percy glanced at himself in the mirror before heading out his room and down the stairs. His mom and dad were in the sitting room discussing ministry business. Molly looked up when he entered the room and smiled.

"She's right outside the burrow dear. I invited her inside but she seems to think that she needs your permission to enter. Lovely gal but I think she's a bit too high strung for you dear."

"Uh…right mum. Well I'll just…"

"Percy, you never told us you had a girlfriend," Arthur said with a knowing smirk. Percy rolled his eyes before heading outside, his Shinigami Squidward right behind him. Once outside he spotted a girl standing a few feet in front of the porch. She was slender with a very nice shape. He could see all her curves because she was wearing a very tight black dress and some black, leather thigh high boots. Her shoulder length hair however, was a purple-ish color which immediately turned him off. _What in the world…? Just who is this person?_

"Hey you!" Startled, the girl turned to face him and smiled.

"GOD!!" she screamed. She ran towards him at lightening speed startling Percy. Then she quickly climbed the stairs and stopped just inches in front of him. A wicked smiled crossed her lips before she threw her arms around him into a crushing hug.

"HEY! GET…OFF…OF…ME!" Percy yelped.

"Oh…I'm sorry. I'm just…so happy to see you," she grinned. Percy stared at her completely at a loss for words. _Just who the heck is this girl? Is she insane? I don't even know her!_

"How can you be happy to see me if you don't know who I am?"

"Well I…"

"Furthermore, just who the heck are you? And…"

"Wow! He's so…huge," she said dreamily. "But I suppose he would be since you're God and all…"

"Huh? What? Are you even listening to me…?"

"And man look at that noggin!" she yelled. She clasped her hands over her mouth before bursting into a fit of laughter. Percy just watched her as she rolled around on the porch laughing and crying at the same time. Every now and then she'd point towards him before laughing some more. After a few minutes of this Percy grew annoyed and decided to shut her up. He withdrew his wand but before he could use it on her something snatched it from his hand. _What the…?_ He looked around wildly trying to figure out what had happened. _Maybe it was…?_

"Squidward…give me back my wand," he muttered.

"Wasn't me hot shot," he sang.

"Then who was it?" Percy snapped.

"It was…my…Shini…gami," the girl managed through another fit of laugher. Percy's body just froze. _Did she just say…a…Shinigami?_

"Sq…Squidward…tell me…?"

"There are other Shinigami and yes there's another one here but I have no idea who he is and could care less," he yawned. Percy stared out into the darkness straining his eyes for the other Shinigami but it was no use. Whoever he or she was, they were pretty well hidden. Percy finally gained enough composure to find his voice and he smirked.

"Hey Squidward? You think the other Shinigami's too afraid to show his face?"

"Huh? Well…uh…I don't know. Maybe."

"Well then. Let's go Squidward. I am bored with my guess already. I have a world to take control of."

"No no no wait!" the girl shrieked. She scrambled to her feet and kneeled before Percy causing him to raise an eyebrow of concern.

"What is it? Why have you come to me? You have a Shinigami which means you also have a Death Note. If you come to kill me why not get it over with otherwise I have…"

"No, you…you got it all wrong. I just…I just wanted to meet you God."

"And what's with all this God crap!" he snapped.

"Well…you're killing off the criminals in the ninja world and therefore you are God." Percy just stared at her, his mouth agape.

"That doesn't make me a God. I won't be a God until I have the people's support. Plus, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Yes but…that's what I come here to tell you. I…I want to help you to become a God."

"Help me?"

"Yes. I…I want to serve you for the rest of my life if I have too. Just say you'll love me and I'm all yours." Percy stared at her again, his mouth wide with shock. _Why on earth would I need her help? We both have a notebook. Can't she watch the news and kill off people without my help? This is a joke._

"Uh…what's your name girl?"

"It's Anko. Anko Weasley if you'll have me," she grinned.

"Uh…right. Anko listen. I'm not who you think I am. Yes, I have a notebook but I am not Kira. You have the wrong guy."

"But…but you've gotta be Kira!" she snapped.

"And what makes you think so?"

"Because L said you are."

"L?" Percy raised an eyebrow before frowning. The past few weeks had been interesting because he'd received several televised messages from a so called 'L'. L said he knew who Kira was and was going to make his move but… The more Percy watched Anko the more suspicious he became. _This girl's nuts! There's just no way she could be working for 'L'. Maybe I can kill her later and then I won't have to worry about it…_

"Hai! L…he…he came to me one day when I was shopping in a discount store. I was alone because…well, I'm always alone," she said sadly. "Anyway, he told me that he knew I was the owner of one of the notebooks but that I couldn't possibly be Kira. He wouldn't tell me why though. I would have died for you ya know? So yeah…he uh told me to approach you but he promised not to hurt you or anything. I told him I'd kill him if he did."

"WHAT! ARE YOU CRAZY!?? YOU LED THAT PSYCHOPATH TO ME?!?!" Percy yelped.

"No, it's not like that GOD…"

"QUIT CALLING ME GOD! GO AWAY!" Percy snatched away from her and started towards the door again.

"I have the eyes," she said softly. Percy stopped dead in his tracks. He turned to her and frowned.

"What eyes?" _She couldn't possibly mean the Shinigami eyes right? No one in their right mind would give up…_

"Hai. I have the eyes and if you don't let me help you then I'll just have to prove it to you by killing your family." Percy let out a haughty laugh.

"You? Threatening me? Go home kid and take your eyes with you." Anko stood up and screamed at the top of her lungs. Suddenly all of Percy's family came running out the door, their wands at the ready.

"What's going on here?" Ron asked. "I was in the middle of something." Fred and George came and stood beside him.

"Yeah we all were," he grinned. Molly and Arthur stared at their boys shaking their heads.

"I'm sure we don't want to know," Arthur mumbled. "Anyway, what the heck is all the screaming about." Anko let out another shrill laugh before she ran off of the porch. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs and shouted.

"KILL THEM ALL SHINIGAMI!"

"Yes master," someone said softly. All of a sudden Percy saw the biggest snake he'd ever seen appear out of nowhere. He was certain his folks couldn't see it for they were still just standing their staring at Anko curiously.

"DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!" All of a sudden, Ron, Fred and George clasped at their chests as the fell to the ground. Arthur and Molly both screamed in horror as their boys gasped for breath. Anko let out another loud shriek and her Shinigami obeyed.

"DELETE! DELETE!" Arthur and Molly both dropped their wands as they fell to the ground clutching their hearts. With teary eyes, Molly looked up at Percy the words 'Why' forming across her lips. Before he could do anything, both of them closed their eyes for the final time. Percy just stood there staring at the ground. His whole body was numb and he was at a lot for words. _All of them…dead…_

"WHY'S YOU DO THAT YOU SADOMASOCHIST!? WHY'D YOU HAVE TO KILL THEM ALL!?!?!" _I…I never meant for any of this to happen!_

"Because I don't take rejection well. Now tell me you love me or you're next." She skipped back up the stairs and stopped just inches in front of him. She cupped his face and planted a big kiss on his lips. Percy neither frowned nor responded to the kiss. He just stood there too afraid to do anything. "Oh Kira. Why so numb sweetie?" she giggled. "I tell you what. How about a strip tease?" She took a few steps back and started running her hands across her chest. "TOUCHA TOUCHA TOUCHA TOUCH MEEEEEEEE! I WANNA BE DIRRRRRRRRTYYYYYYYYY!"

"Hn. Yes. I've had quite enough of this already. AVADA KEDAVRA!"

All of a sudden Anko dropped dead on the porch. Percy should have felt some kind of relief but he did not. He looked up to see a handsome boy, not much older than himself approaching the porch. He was wearing a black cloak but you could see his face clearly. He had beautiful blue eyes and shoulder length gray hair that seemed to shine despite the darkness. He was wearing some nice specs that he reached up to adjust once as he approached him.

Percy had no idea whether he should attempt to run or not. Either way he was probably dead and so he might as well look death right in the eyes. The boy walked up to him and stopped a few inches from his face. A curious smirk formed across his lips before he grabbed Percy pulling him into a kiss. He pulled away a few seconds later and grinned.

"Let's go sweetheart."

"But…but…who are you?" Percy just wanted to cry but the boy grabbed him pulling him into a hug.

"I'm Kabuto. And I want you to come with me. You can't stay here all by yourself. Everyone is dead and…"

"And it's all my fault," Percy sobbed. "I should have left the notebook…"

"No. You did right by picking up that notebook. Otherwise, I never would have found my equal, my better half," he said softly. He stroked Percy's spine before planting a kiss on his neck.

"But…you don't even know me like that," Percy stammered.

"I know enough to know that you would have eventually beat me in the end. You're brilliant."

"Beat you…? But…what do you mean…?"

"I'm 'L' and you are Kira. I sent Anko here to retrieve you but I never thought she'd nut up on you like that."

"Oh God. I'm going to jail! They're going to put me in Azkaban!"

"No, Percy calm down. You're not going to Azkaban. I'm taking you away from here. Far away from here where you'll be safe forever."

"But…what about…I mean…I can't just…"

"If we stay here any longer the ministry will be here soon. They'll get both of us for this. But come with me and you'll never have to worry about anything again." Percy looked around at his dead family members before nodding. Kabuto took him by the hand and led him off into the darkness. Percy had no idea what life had in store for him now but he decided he had no choice in the matter. He just knew that he'd learned his lesson about playing God. Leave it to the experts or it will bring nothing but heartache and pain.

"HEY! WHAT ABOUT ME?!?! YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME BEHIND!" Squidward yelled. Kabuto stopped in his tracks and pulled out Percy's wand.

"_Accio_ deathnote!" The notebook flew out of the burrow and landed on the ground in front of Kabuto. He smirked as he pointed the wand at the notebook.

"_Incendio!_" he mumbled. The notebook ignited into flames and Squidwards shouts could be heard throughout the night. No. Not really but we'll go with that. And so Kabuto and his beloved Kira lived happily ever after and Squidward, well…he died again.

**The End**


End file.
